Moving Pieces Always Stick

8.30.2019 Grand Rapids, MI


Taking leaps of faith can seem ridiculous for a personality type that needs structure, but those scared to leap are those with distrust in the way God leads. He leads by making us uncomfortable and often times in more areas than one. There's no specification when he's moving you accordingly. I remember reading stories about people who packed up their life and moved to New York or some other major city with no real plan and little to no money. I always admired them. We hear the stories often and personally, I would think of how brave they were to go after life when it called. I never imagined myself being in their shoes. Constricted vision does that to you.. but God, he expands what we think we want into everything we never knew we needed.

Letting go of everything you know, is a crippling fear, which is another reason why people stick to what's familiar. Interestingly enough, your soul gives you signs of what it longs for. I can't quite explain feeling a pull towards certain places you experience, but it's strong. I recognized my sign when a place I had never even lived felt so much like home. So, I went.

As many of you know, I moved from LA back to my hometown of Fresno after a stressful and disappointing time of employment. Fresno was the breather I honestly needed and I don't really talk about it much. Going back home made me appreciate the city more than I did when I left. It must be something about growing older and realizing how special a place truly is after it has done its pruning and molding, but I basically reached that point. Although it was nice to be back with family, the job market wasn't desirable. If you've read any of my old posts you know the story. I got hired. Got fired. Got hired again. Bet on myself and created a business.. but in that time span, I was taking chances. I'm still tweaking and realigning to this very day and I "launched" in November of 2018. I'm not going to act like I'm this new entrepreneurial guru, I'm not... but I am learning, taking my time, and trusting the development of every area of my life. I decided to stop stressing over jobs and rejection emails. I decided to stop admiring the vision that job descriptions painted in my mind or how legit I would be with a fancy title. I released my forceful wants and let God point me in the direction that he saw fit.

For the first time in my life, I felt very little pressure to figure it out. I had this sense of confirmation that it was already done (and in good God fashion, it definitely was). There's nothing that's more annoying than rejection letters when job hunting, but the bright side is you get to do passion work. Well, if you're familiar with my blog you know I claim consistency every new year and granted I can do better, but I don't have control of when I need my time of isolation. I was being told to be still by a simple disinterest in writing, which is a God-given gift, and other millennial stuff like social media. In doing that I started noticing subtle confirmations, like having an issue finding work in Fresno and getting phone interviews in Michigan. So I took little mental notes of that and soon decided that I was going to move, but life has its ways of testing you. Once I made up my mind, a family friend came to me with a job opportunity with a salary I probably wouldn't turn down. The issue? At the time, I was in a long-distance relationship and had been for three years. Reading that you're probably thinking "why would you ever hesitate choosing your career over love?".. well because of love and I've learned to not make my career my identity or my life anymore. So back to the story, I got an interview. Was told that I would have to commit for a year and my mind immediately went to "another year of long-distance..which would be five years". That very little pressure I was feeling went out the window completely. Mainly because I wanted to ultimately make sure that I would be making the right decision, but I worked myself up so much for a whole week that I just prayed. I prayed and specifically said, "Lord if this isn't what you have in mind for me, don't let me get the job".

Y'all, I have never asked to NOT get a job. But this is how conflicted I was feeling. Honestly, I believe I already had my mind made up that even if I did get the job I would still leave.

Let's not skip the hard fact that I didn't have anything lined up in the place I planned on moving to either. I just knew I kept snagging employer interest and "we'll keep your resume on file until you get in town" was beginning to reoccur often. So, I figured since no one is open to digital interviews, I need to be there to get a job. That was my sole plan. Move and figure it out. At the same time, I was stressing about leaving California when I had just got my business off the ground and was worried about how I was going to manage it all by myself.

Of course, God comes through.

Not only did he manage to bring me a blessing to help me in business but he also re-opened an interview process for a position I had applied to, but assumed I didn't get after months of not hearing anything back. Needless to say, a digital interview was granted and ten minutes after concluding, I got the job. Not even realizing how perfectly he had placed me I was just overjoyed that I had a little piece of structure going into this move. As time goes on, I learn that I, little ol me, secured my position out of ten other really really great candidates. Let me tell you when the door is yours... it's yours 100%! His will is just very reassuring to things that I wanted to happen for career and business.. and although I did slightly worry how I would do it at times, he brought me the people and opportunities needed to fulfill what he set forth as my purpose. It's refreshing.

So here I am, updating you on my life happenings. As my twenty-eighth birthday rolled in, I started a brand new chapter. I'm really excited about this experience that I know is going to stretch me and force me to grow even more, but I'm completely fine with that. It's an exciting time for a new beginning all-around in my world and I can't wait to explore. This was the next step and expansion that I wanted. I have so much gratitude for all of the life lessons I'm receiving and grateful for the intuitive awakening of self. Here's to my bittersweet ending in California and creating new memories and a new home in Michigan.

2 comments

  1. I had so many "yesss!" moments while reading this!! I'm so proud of you and so happy that you took the leap!

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    1. This is Shay by the way, it's not showing my name!

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