A Butterfly Unfolding


For the last month, I have been excessively intrigued with butterflies. In many ways, I can resonate with everything that a butterfly represents. Growing through the many changes in my life recently have caused me to really embrace all that I am encountering day by day. The obstacles, triumphs, and the boatload of emotions. It gets frustrating when your momentum gets interrupted and you have to regroup, but that's the beauty within the journey that can easily be misunderstood. Struggles are ugly, but they literally force you to grow. Of course, there are days that I long for times where I can finally catch a break and watch everything I desire to fall in line like a domino effect.. but if it were to be that easy, I wouldn't be sitting here at my office desk, drinking a glass of Stella Rosa and sharing how I'm still a work in progress. Every single day, I'm working on my own self-improvement, because I'm human. I have my fears and some doubts just like anyone else. I get in my moments of impatience. I get irritable with the lack of results. I rush too much. I'm human.

January was a month I was put in an unfamiliar and uncomfortable position. What felt like a dead end then, allowed me to become fully aware that I simply needed to trust in God more. Doubt was embedded within me. The fire beneath me was no longer lit like it used to be. I was allowing my circumstance to overwork and take over my entire being. I believe that everyone has gone through something that has changed them in a way that they could never go back to the person they were once before. For me, it opened my eyes to the transformation I was in the midst of going through. All of my emotions and worries shaded the bigger picture before. I couldn't see that restoration and healing were the sole purposes for my circumstance. Extreme emotional growth has taken place. My universe was shaken to awaken me.

This chapter in my life is called the caterpillar moment. Accept your caterpillar moments. When you feel cocooned in isolation, confused or unsure what you're going to do next and can't find your way out of darkness.. remember that this is similar to the place where caterpillars go to grow their wings. Strength and growth come only through continuous effort and struggle. So I'm taking extra care of myself in making sure I never lose hope because I have the strength to believe, in time I will emerge from my cocoon transformed. Something beautiful can emerge from something completely falling apart. When it feels like the universe is saying give up, hope whispers try it one more time. If you feel your hope drifting, try to hold onto just a smidge, that small portion is what will get you through your caterpillar experience.

Transformation means literally going beyond your form. Letting go of where you were   in order to become who you really are. Thus,  if something as frail as a butterfly can emerge from the darkness, so can you. We're all a little fragile, but be patient with yourself and remain open to life as it's happening. As I looked back on my life, I realized that every time I was upset or discouraged from thinking I was being rejected from something good, God was redirecting me towards something better in every way possible. You don't really see it until you're put in a circumstance to reflect on your situation. What you badly want, isn't always for you and that's okay. However, just because one door didn't open or two might have closed, doesn't mean God doesn't have an additional ten waiting. Any and everything that is for you is yours and yours alone.  Also, it's valuable to consider that maybe God closed that door because he knows you're worth so much more. Every prayer is answered, but God doesn't always say "yes".

The state of your life is nothing more than a reflection of your state of mind. Life changes when you become brave enough to accept everything, good and bad. It progresses the more you persevere. So, what good are your wings if you won't have the courage to fly? Your wings are there to show you what you can become. All of your hardships and battles to get to where you're trying to go, those are your roots. Roots to humble and remind you where you came from. I'm a butterfly unfolding and once I transform; life continues in a new and graceful form. Patience is key throughout your caterpillar moments of you finding yourself. Time creates the opportunity for you to fully develop from a caterpillar and reveal the fragile, ethereal beauty and divine creation of God.

Continually embrace your growth.

Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. So I'll leave a little piece of Gandhi wisdom with you. Keep your thoughts positive because your thoughts become your words. Keep your words positive because your words become your behavior. Keep your behavior positive because your behavior becomes your habits. Keep your habits positive because your habits become your values. Keep your values positive because your values become your destiny.

Accept  then act. Whatever the present moment contains, accept as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly. There are secret opportunities hidden inside every disappointment. Life is a balance of holding on and letting go...but you must let go and accept your evolution in order for the butterfly to unfold, emerge and let yourself fly.

"We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty."
-Maya Angelou 

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© Ashley Avenu. john 15:5 .