Unbothered | How to Move Beyond Negativity

Doesn't it seem like no matter how much you stay in your lane, somebody always has to swerve over to throw negativity? Always worried about what you're doing in your life. It's confusing actually because you don't do anything but live your life and that seemingly infuriates people. I often times wonder why people are so adamant on being vile and I have never been able to grasp the concept of worrying about someone else's life, mainly because 1.) it doesn't pay me and 2.) it serves me no purpose. The younger me would have let all the negativity, hate and ill wishes get to me. The way I used to look at it was: "I'm so kindhearted and easy to get along with, why would anyone hate or dislike me?" Now I see it as: "It comes with the territory." and I'll elaborate later. See, I'm the type of person that roots for everyone. I love seeing people accomplish goals and dreams. Seeing others happy, genuinely makes me happy even if I'm currently not in as good of a position as them. I cheer for people. I was raised to believe that there is enough sun for everybody to shine, but see that's the sheer difference between an envious soul and mine. 

No decision will pay off more than prioritizing your life and giving extreme focus + energy to things with the highest return. You won't be able to thank yourself enough the moment you decide to rise and mentally distance yourself away from what's being used to distract you. That's really all negativity is. Background noise and distractions. Being petty is fairly easy, but stepping up a level to have peace of mind is truly fulfilling.  Intermittently, we allow ourselves to fall into the mess others are propelling and stunt our own growth. Don't compromise your self-respect. Starve your distractions and feed your focus. It's hard being the bigger person, that's why most are incapable of stepping up to do so. You see shade being thrown at you and you have to be strong-willed and ignore it. You see the comments and you have to scroll pass like they don't exist. You refrain from addressing so much negativity because there's really no point to engage in tit for tat mini sagas. What you have to keep in mind is that people only do and say things for a reaction. They are so bothered by the fact that you're unbothered. So it's best to let whoever say and think whatever they choose. Let them criticize the person they think you are because those who know the least about you, have the absolute most to say. 

The number one rule to moving beyond hate is always staying gracious.

When you have a good head on your shoulders, strong in your faith, have morals and you're doing well for yourself you're going to have people who dislike you. Reason being, you have so much to offer and it's noticed. They have no other choice but try to compete. Your inner beauty shines brighter than anything on the exterior. That's what gravitates people towards you. They either want to be included in your light or try to dim it down, while secretly wishing their own light was as lit as yours. At the end of the day, the best way to rise above a VIP is to do more of what they hate.  You're already disliked for being unapologetically you, so continue being authentic and true. People can't stand when you're happy and doing good. This is what I meant when I stated: "it comes with the territory" no matter what you choose to do or where you go— the critics will be waiting. It all comes with the gig.

VIP= Vexed, Irrelevant People. Here's an observation I've come to realize about these kinds of people. Their main priority is to try and bring you down, for whatever reason, because of their own unhappiness. Typically, you would think that people would have better and more important things to do than keeping tabs and worry about you. Consequently, well-adjusted individuals are too busy being well-adjusted and happy. To be on someone's mind is to have power over them. Revel in the fact that they subconsciously reserve thoughts and energy for you.

With all that being said, every time you take yourself to a new level; prepare for a new devil.
Take no sh*t, but spread no evil and just continue flourishing. Surround yourself with well-wishers and go-getters. Make peace a priority and negativity can't exist and always remember, the blessed don't beef with the miserable. Should you ever find yourself the victim of other people's bitterness, smallness or insecurities, remember things could be worse  you could be them.

 Master the art of truly being unbothered. It's just beautiful seeing yourself be above all that... focused and unaffected. Let your light ignore, block and mute out negativity.

I tried to keep it short and sweet, but feel free to share, comment and indulge in positivity.



  1. What a great post. We tend to allow peoples negativity to get the best of us but when we remain unbothered it rubs them up the wrong way and strength us aswell :)
    Lia X

    1. So true! Thank you for taking time out to read and I'm glad you could identify with the message. I always like to refer to the phrase "when they go low, we go high" because it's the perfect way to make sure you stay above drama an negativity to protect everything you have going on / are trying to manifest. Blessings get blocked when you wallow in bitterness!

  2. I couldn't have said this better myself, most of your quotes I hear my parents saying. Keep your head up and continue to be a positive force.

    1. Thank you so much for reading Cleta! Prioritizing my peace of mind has been a luxury and a necessity here lately. Parents always know best!


© Ashley Avenu | All rights reserved.
Blog Design Handcrafted